Have you ever wondered how the Chinese raise their children?
For many of us, Eastern culture seems mysterious and incredibly distant. It has its own traditions and rituals. And some of them seem strange to a European person. And some of them - even wild. This is especially true when it comes to bringing up children.
There's a lot of of new parenting trends and parenting tips. But China has its own way of looking at it. It's more traditional.
Despite this, many girls decide to marry Asians and move to eastern countries.
One of those is Violetta, who was interviewed by the magazine «Chalk.».
She was born in Kazakhstan and got married 7 years ago and moved to China. In 2021, she gave birth to a son. And today we will tell you how children are brought up in China.
Parenting abroad
The first month after childbirth becomes a mandatory vacation for women in China. She doesn't just not work, she rests in everything.
In the past, women were not even allowed to wash and brush their teeth during these 30 days. But now there is an opportunity to go to a special center where special nannies take care of mother and child around the clock. But it costs a lot.
But mom there is fed 6 times and has many procedures to recover from childbirth.
But a young mother should also rest at home. In China, it is customary for a mother, mother-in-law or nanny to help her during the first time after childbirth.
A husband can help. That was the case with Violetta.
Her husband took a leave of absence from work for the whole time of his wife's recovery and helped her a lot with the baby. He also made sure that the girl never got cold.
Violetta says that even when it was warm, he would heat up the apartment a lot and wrap her in warm jackets outside.
Choosing a name for a child in China is an extremely difficult and responsible step. In many other countries, it is entirely the parents' choice. As they wish, so it will be. But not in China.
In China, they believe that a name has a very strong influence on the child's destiny. It should not just be chosen based on one's wishes. The name should reflect the father's lineage and even be tied to the zodiac sign.
Some Chinese believe that their name completely influences their destiny. And they change their names just to change their life situation.
So for this important matter, Violetta and her husband even went to see a monk.
As a result, the child's name became an amalgamation of cultures and traditions of different nations. The first character in the name is the husband's surname, while the second and third characters mean «family» and «connection».
They named their son Allan.
The Chinese also take the year of birth extremely seriously. More specifically, the symbol of the year. Most couples specifically choose a year for the birth of a child that matches the year of birth of the parents. Exactly according to the Chinese calendar.
The Chinese system of education
Many parents nowadays try to foster independence and self-sufficiency in their children. But things are a little different with children in China.
Until the age of 3, it is customary to pamper a child and indulge absolutely all his whims. The Chinese relatives allowed Allan everything. Violetta had conflicts with them because of this.
All the more so because Violetta herself was brought up in a radically different way. She has always been independent and moved out of her parents' house at the age of 18.
Things as common to us as going to the toilet on your own and cleaning up toys for a child under 3 in China are wild.
As children grow older, learning becomes the most important thing for them. And in order for the child to concentrate on school results, he or she is relieved of any household chores.
Despite this, respect for elders is the foundation of upbringing in China. In the past, parents used to accompany a child throughout his or her life. They literally chose the child's place of study and work.
Now, of course, a lot has changed. Especially in a metropolitan area.
«There is a lot of competition in China, and they believe that if you don't raise a child to be hardened, it will be difficult for them in the future,» Violetta says.
Therefore, children in China are pampered at an early age, but then begin to prepare them for adulthood.
Russian language in the Chinese family
Violetta herself knows 3 languages and realizes how useful this skill is in today's world.
Her son Allan now knows Chinese and Russian. Plus, he is learning English at the kindergarten.
Violetta admits that it is quite difficult for her son to maintain a good level of Russian. After all, everyone around him speaks Chinese. This has a great effect on pronunciation. The child starts to make mistakes even in simple words.
But the main thing for Violetta is to bring up a happy independent person who knows himself and does what he loves. And for this, she believes, it is important to understand that he is a separate person and to treat him with respect.
