It's ten minutes before the lesson. The child says, «I don't want to.».
A minute later, an adult tells it to another adult. «He refuses to speak Russian again.».
An unnecessary conclusion emerged between these two phrases. The child said that he wanted something, and the adult retold it as a refusal.
What was said
«I don't want to» primarily reports on a desire. Right now I don't want to do anything.
In itself, it does not indicate whether the child has decided that there will be no lesson. In a conversation, such a reply can also be interpreted as a refusal. It depends on the situation, the intonation, and what the child does next.
If the child no longer reports a desire to do something but instead says that they won’t do it, the phrase sounds more direct.
«I won't.».
What «I will not» differs from
«Budu» is the future tense of the verb «to be». The full phrase is longer: «I will not be doing it»; in ordinary conversation the second word is usually omitted.
A person who says «I won’t» is already talking about an action. Before the lesson, this more directly resembles a decision or a refusal.
«Don't want» is in the present tense and indicates a desire for something now. Whether the child has made a decision is not clear from these two words.
It's easy to check the difference. These words go together in a single sentence and don't interfere with each other.
«I don't want to, but I will.
That's what an adult says before a workout and a schoolboy before an exam.
It can also happen the other way around.
«I want to, but I won't.».
This is about the third ice cream.
And when the child screams «I don't want to and I won't!», he says both words at the same time. One of them is not enough because they mean different things.
Where the child has already heard both words
At the table.
«Will you have soup?»
The adult asks about the action, and the child answers about the action. «I will.» «I won't, thank you.».
There is no rudeness in such a «I won’t» statement. The person said that they won’t show up.
Another question sounds like a request, but it asks about a desire.
«Do you want some supplements?»
It is answered by «I want» or «I don't want».
Sometimes the issues are discussed directly during the same conversation. The child doesn't want soup, but they will have it because that's what they agreed on. Both halves of this sentence are true.
The same goes for the lesson. «I don’t want to» answers the question about desire. Whether the lesson will take place is the second question, and there is no way to tell from one «I don’t want to» answer.
The same word on another day
The child knows the word «will not» from an early age, and knows what a promise is.
«I will no longer.».
Thus, children often promise not to repeat what they are scolded for again. The phrase is often said alongside the word «sorry». Adults take it seriously and then remind them of it.
«You said you wouldn’t do it anymore.».
«I will no longer» sounds like a promise, so people then go back to it. «I don't want» such a promise does not in itself contain anything.
Therefore, replacing one with another in retelling is inaccurate. The child is given a stronger word than the one he said.
There is also the «don't want» option.»
«I don't want to» usually sounds softer than «I don't want to.».
In the «I don’t want» phrase, the speaker directly names their desire. «I don’t want» is impersonal; the desire doesn’t seem to have come on its own.
«Something doesn't feel right» usually sounds softer than all three options.
About desire or about action
Seven short sentences. For each one, you need to choose what it is about: a desire, an action, or both at once. You can press all three options in turn; there are no points or a timer. The exercise is suitable for both adults and children who already read in Russian.
The trainer only understands words. Only the person who said the line knows what it means, and that’s a better question to ask.
How does it sound in English?
There is a similar pair in English.
For the direct «I don’t want to do it» statement, closer to what I don’t want to do is I don’t want to. For the «I won’t do it» statement, when it’s already about a decision or refusal, I won’t or I’m not going to. For the «I don’t feel like it» statement, closest to what I don’t want to do is I don’t feel like it.
A child who is studying in an English-language school can be shown both pairs next to each other.
One question instead of a conclusion
When the «I don’t want» phrase is heard, don’t assume it’s because of the child. Ask.
«Do you not want to or won’t you?»
The question is short, and both words are mentioned in it. The child chooses it himself.
There can be several answers, and they are all different.
«I don't want to, but I will.
«I won't.».
«I don't want to today.».
Sometimes the child talks about what he/she doesn’t want to do: write, turn on the camera, answer first. Then «I don’t want» is already about one thing, and not about the whole Russian language.
What to do with each of these answers is up to the family. This column is just about what was said.
And one more thing. When retelling the conversation to another adult or teacher, repeat the child's words as they were heard.
«He said he didn't want to.
This is an accurate retelling. Whether this was also a rejection of the lesson can be understood from the continuation of the conversation. But the child did not utter the words «I will not.».
The words «want» and «will» are also spoken by children during class. At the «Russian for Bilinguals» course at Palme School, children aged four to seventeen engage in online group lessons of up to eight people. In class, the child hears the teacher's and their peers' Russian speech.
The course can be tried out for free at two free lessons. They will help you get to know the teacher and understand whether the format is suitable for the child.
Sign up for free lessonsFrequently asked questions about «I don't want to» and «I won't»
What is the difference between «I don't want to» and «I won't»?
«I don't want to» indicates a desire now. «I won't» already indicates an action and sounds like a decision or refusal. These words can be combined into a single phrase, for example «I don't want to, but I will.».
Does «I don't want» mean that the child has refused the lesson?
It’s not necessary. The «don’t want» itself speaks of a desire. Depending on the situation, the tone of voice and what the child does next, the refusal may sound different. Understanding this is helped by the question «Do you want to or not?».
What does «I will no longer» mean?
This promise not to repeat the act is often said alongside the phrase «I'm sorry,» and adults then return to it.
How to say «I don't want» and «I won't» in English?
For «I don't want to do it»: closer to «I don't want to.» For «I won't do it»: closer to "I won't." For "I don't feel like it": closer to "I don't want to.".
There is an article about why a child resists classes in the blog. Seven reasons why a child does not want to go to class.
